Is breastfeeding a sexual act?

See the full article from Dallas Observer at 1-Hour Arrest; When does a snapshot of a mother breast-feeding her child become kiddie porn?	Is breastfeeding a sexual act? From the News:  Children taken away because of a breastfeeding photo in Texas Adapted from "Breastfeeding a crime?" by Linda Folden Palmer Two children were taken away from their parents after a photo of a 12-month-old baby with his lips on his mother's nipple was developed at a local drug store and then reported to authorities by the shop's clerk. No experts were consulted, no evaluations were made, the children were simply whisked away and the parents charged with the second-degree felony of "sexual performance of a minor." According to the Dallas Observer, after responding to the photo clerk's alert, Richardson police in Texas reportedly considered the pictures to contain sexuality. A Child Protective Services supervisor, without any information beyond the photos, ordered the children to be removed from their home. The police searched the one-room home for other evidence of pornography or questionable parenting as the children were taken away from their perplexed and pleading mother Jacqueline Mercado on November 13, 2002. Nothing was found. Subsequent psychological examinations of the parents revealed no signs of sexual deviancy.  The family's attorney Steven Lafuente was very surprised to see the innocence of the pictures and to discover that there was no other evidence whatsoever. Still, a Grand Jury swiftly indicted the couple in January, basing their decision on the breastfeeding photo and no other incriminating evidence.  The charges against the couple were dropped in late March after a reporter from the Dallas Observer asked a District Attorney to look into the case. The children remained in State Custody however. When reporter Thomas Korosec broke the story in the Observer on April 17, the paper received some 50 letters and the courthouse and attorneys were similarly flooded with mail. Members of a national attachment parenting organization flooded the offices with their own treasured breastfeeding and bath time photos. Only days after the story hit the stands, the children were returned to their mother. The attorney described the distraught Spanish-speaking parents as never entirely understanding what they had done wrong, why they were being threatened with prison, and why their family was torn apart. They explained to him how they had worked so hard and long to move their family to this "land of the free" and that they loved their children so very much. They expressed that they would never do anything to harm their children and did not intend to break the laws of their new country. While the family tries to heal, the real crime is going entirely ignored. It is a sad statement of our new civilization when a photo store clerk, two police detectives, a CPS supervisor, and an entire grand jury have all forgotten how babies are fed, and are unable to appreciate the treasury of capturing the tender fleeting moments of childhood on film. Dr. Palmer coordinates attachment parenting support groups throughout San Diego County and lectures and consults in issues of pediatric nutrition and health. She maintains the website The Baby Bond.com.	A NORMAL LOVING NURTURING ACT NOTHING INDECENT GOING ON!
Read more about hormones and bonding in this excellent article by Linda Folden Palmer Bonding Matters: The Chemistry of Attachment	The above incident sadly proves how in some people's minds breastfeeding is a sexual act.  In other words, they think that the mother and/or the baby have sexual feelings while nursing is taking place.  The truth is that breastfeeding is fundamentally a feeding act.  It is about giving food or nourishment to the child.  Female breasts produce milk, which is the normal food for human babies.  The obvious biological function of breasts is to make milk, not to be an essential part of human reproduction, so WHY in the world is breastfeeding seen as a sexual act? Is breastfeeding an act of sexual pleasure? Do mother and baby feel something sexually while nursing?  To think that the baby would feel something sexually is utter nonsense.  Little babies and children don't have any such thoughts or feelings going through their mind.  For them the breast is simply a source of food and comfort.  Of course nursing feels good to the baby, but that feeling is not sexual, just a general good feeling. The mother also generally enjoys nursing her child (unless her nipples are sore!).  This is largely due to a hormone-like substance called oxytocin which is released as a consequence of nursing and holding the infant, the levels being based on the amount of this kind of contact. Oxytocin also produces uterine contractions during labor, is strongly involved in mother-child bonding after birth and during breastfeeding relationship, it is released during sexual intercourse, and its blood levels rise also in response to touch, warmth, and remembering a positive relationship.  It is released in the brain chiefly in response to social contact, but its release is especially pronounced with skin-to-skin contact. This hormone has been called the "love hormone" or the "cuddle hormone" or the "bonding hormone".  It provides a sense of calm and well being and promotes bonding patterns and creates desire for further contact with the individuals inciting its release.  It helps the mother and child to bond together.  It is involved in those mothering feelings we experience after giving birth to a child. Since it is present during sexual intercourse, it also helps men and women to bond together and form lasting relationships.  It makes you want to cuddle, touch, be close, be affectionate towards another human being.  Without oxytocin, animals don't recognize or remember their partner though they are able to recognize objects.  Autistic children (who often have difficulty with social relationships) have lowered levels of this hormone. Oxytocin is not the only part of the soup of chemicals produced in our bodies when we cuddle and feel close to our children.  Opioids (pleasure hormones) are natural morphine-like chemicals that reduce pain awareness and create feelings of elation. Social contacts, particularly touch - especially between parent and child - induce opioid release, creating good feelings that will enhance bonding. It is wrong to say that breastfeeding is a sexual act just because the "cuddle hormone" oxytocin is present both during nursing and sexual intercourse.  We should instead say that both nursing and sexual intercourse are connected to LOVE, INTIMACY, CLOSENESS - one towards your child, the other towards your spouse. Hugging, kissing, nursing your child is not a sexual act but AN ACT OF MOTHERLY LOVE. Sexual arousal during breastfeeding Some women are concerned that nursing will cause them to be sexually aroused, and they do not want that. Rest assured, it does not usually happen. Nursing is usually relaxing, enjoyable, and cuddly in the sense as explained above. There can also be a feeling of "relief" if your breasts are very full pre-nursing—similar to the feeling of relief you get when voiding a very full bladder. Some women may actually confuse these good feelings with the feelings of slight sexual arousal. Breastfeeding women actually often experience sexual problems, for many reasons: the elevated level of prolactin reduces libido, low estrogen reduces vaginal lubrication, and the lack of periods causes reduced testosterone levels, which again reduces the sexual drive. So the hormonal environment during lactation is actually not conducive to sexual arousal. Then, in the immediate postpartum period women often experience exhaustion and may have stitches in the vaginal area. That said, feelings of sexual arousal are possible during nursing. Some women do experience it, but the majority of women the majority of the time do not. This is not studied in great detail so there is not much scientific data, but from anecdotal evidence it sounds that it is more common that the woman is NOT aroused by breastfeeding. The arousal is probably connected to how much the woman is used to nipple stimulation in her prior sexual experiences, and to what extent she is mentally associating breasts with sex. As we know, the brain is our most important sexual organ, and people can be aroused by various stimuli, as long as the brain connects the stimulus with sexuality. Is it WRONG to feel sexually aroused during nursing? Suppose you feel aroused while breastfeeding from some stimulus, whatever it might be. The stimulus could come from your own mind, directly from your husband, or from seeing something that stimulates you. You may wonder if you are doing something wrong or harming your baby. Now, there is nothing wrong per se in the actual physical feeling of sexual desire. It's just a normal feeling or desire of the human body. Appetite for food is another normal desire, thirst yet another, and desire to sleep one more. Just to have that feeling is not wrong in itself, just like it's not wrong to feel hungry or thirsty. Similarly, assuming you are able to control your desires, your baby is not harmed by you feeling that way. Just think: your baby shouldn't be harmed just because you happen to be FEEL hungry or thirsty (assuming that you don't suddenly dash to eat & leave the baby behind). Your baby shouldn't be harmed just because you feel tired—assuming you are able to stay alert enough to continue taking care of him. And your baby shouldn't be harmed just because your brain produces chemicals associated with a feeling of sexual desire—assuming you don't dash off somewhere because of it and forget about the responsibilities with your baby. So, most of the time, it might have been better that the stimulus didn't come along because the feelings can lessen your concentration on whatever else you are doing (nursing & taking care of the baby). But the feeling per se is just a natural feeling and not "evil" in itself (though it can lead to evildoing, as we all realize).   Another important point to consider is...	A NORMAL LOVING NURTURING ACT NOTHING INDECENT GOING ON!                       HEY, THIS IS WHAT BREAST IS FOR! (for milk and a toy)
	Are breasts sexual organs? Certainly people in the US, UK, Australia, and other countries think of breasts as being a sexual organ.  However, the obvious biological function of breast is to make milk for the baby.  Human reproduction can certainly be carried on without ever touching the breasts, so breasts are NOT inherently a sexual organ. But are they somehow both a feeding machine and secondarily a sexual organ, as many think?  Consider the fact that about 100 years ago woman's ankles were very sexual in men's minds.  And tiny feet were a fetish for Chinese men in times past.  All kinds of parts of female body have been inspiring to men during history and in various cultures, so we ask you to consider that breasts simply have been turned into a similar fetish in US society and others influenced by it. Breasts are a part of the "whole package of a woman", and men can easily respond sexually to seeing a woman — but the difference is that breasts in themselves are not any special "arousal" machines or obsession points UNLESS the influences from around you have wired your brain to think so. In other words, if a man grows up without this "breasts = sex" influence from media, TV, magazines, and peers, then to him, female breasts will not be any more special than a woman's face, feminine hair, wide hips, narrow waist, or other such feminine characteristics. Also, please read our article Are breasts and nipples sexual organs?. Nipples are a sensitive body part (though the sensitivity depends on hormones), and rubbing or stimulating them releases oxytocin, but it is for this purpose: nipple stimulation (as by baby's suckling) causes the brain to release hormone oxytocin, which then "opens up" the doors of the milk-making cells so the milk will flow in the lactating breast. That is all scientifically well documented. Many women have "learned" that touching nipples is supposed to excite them sexually - so then it does, but it is the brain that is responsible for their sexual feelings. Our mind is very powerful; after all, some people get sexually aroused by thinking about certain fruits. But this connection "nipple rubbing = sexual arousal" in the mind does not make nipples by nature an erogenous body part. "Well, we do have a peculiar obsession with breasts in this culture. A lot of people think it's just the human nature to be fascinated with breasts but in many cultures, breasts aren't sexual at all. I interviewed a young anthropologist working with women in Mali, in a country in Africa where women go around with bare breasts. They're always feeding their babies. And when she told them that in our culture men are fascinated with breasts there was an instant of shock. The women burst out laughing. They laughed so hard, they fell on the floor. They said, "You mean, men act like babies?" Carolyn Latteier, the author of Breasts, The Women's Perspective on an American Obsession, in a TV program "All about breasts".   Sources 1-Hour Arrest; When does a snapshot of a mother breast-feeding her child become kiddie porn? from Dallas Observer Bonding Matters: The Chemistry of Attachment - an excellent article that discusses the roles of oxytocin, vasopressin, prolactin, opioids and more in bonding. By Linda Folden Palmer Oxytocin may mediate the benefits of positive social interaction and emotions. by Uvnas-Moberg K. Psychoneuroendocrinology. 1998 Nov;23(8):819-35. Discussion about breastfeeding and sex drive at Medhelp.org. Plasma oxytocin levels in autistic children by Modahl C, Green L, Fein D, Morris M, Waterhouse L, Feinstein C, Levin H. Biol Psychiatry. 1998 Feb 15;43(4):270-7.	WHY THE FUSS ABOUT BREASTS?  THEY ARE JUST PROTRUSIONS TO NOURISH BABIES!

Other people's comments

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The following comments are from various visitors to www.007b.com. 007 Breasts is not necessarily endorsing everything written in the comments. The comments and opinions below belong to the commenters who made them. The comments are posted here because they might further help and encourage men and women who visit this website; however 007 Breasts is NOT responsible for the comments nor for any loss or damage caused by reading them.

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After reading this article "Is breastfeedig a sexual act?" For me not, it is an act of motherly love. I am a mother of a 6-year old girl and breastfed her for 2 years. I did not experience arousal never at all. I just wanted to become close to my daughter and it really works, so to all pregnant mothers, and incoming mothers I encourage you to do the same thing.

fanie andres

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I really just like your stand on our Creator :) that is really cool to see! And I also like that you try to downplay breasts as such a sexual thing, I for one know men who don't want boobs the way the world expects them to, and I'm glad to know that it really is not all about that.

Erika

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Breastfeeding is good in every angle because breast is natural while other child feeding is man made. Children can gain something natural from their mother's breastfeeding. Mothers, I want to use this opportunity to tell you that breastfeeding is the best to give your child.

Maximus

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As a Licensed Massage Therapist no longer practicing, women breasts can be massaged in a mannmer to cause lymphatic drainage toward the underarm lymph nodes, however avoiding contact with the nipples. It bears to warn any one massage therapist that the patients must request it and for the massage therapist to avoid touching them in such a manner that would mislead the patient to think that they are being improperly touched.

John Ventura

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I would say my breast and nipples are indeed sex organs. Having my breast played with and gently squeezed and my hard nipples sucked on and gently pulled stright out as far as I can take it. I start automatically having very intense orgasms. Thats just playing with only my breast and nipples.

SUE

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I love this quote "If breastfeeding is sexual then a bottle is a dildo." I can't believe how controversial this whole breastfeeding thing is!! I am currently ebf my 7 month old... even now I get the occasional comment, "Wow you're still doing that!" or "When are you going to wean him?" I just laugh things like this off... I'll keep doing it until he decides he has had enough, not just because someone gives a negative comment or suggestion!

kat

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I am the mother of 3 children and we are expecting our 4th. I attempted brestfeeding with our oldest and found it very challenging. I stopped after about 3 months. I found that I could not seperate my breast from my sexuality and felt like I was in the wrong by brestfeeding my children. I know and understand that breastfeeding is the BEST option for feeding. I plan to try again with our 4th and have been trying to get past my veiw points abouts breasts and sex. Reading these articles was immensley helpful, it helped me to realize that culture was all that influencing my feelings and that the female breast are meant to feed our children not as sexual objects. Thank you for helping me see the light.

stephanie

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I think we're slowly coming out of these dark ages about breasts and what they're really for. More and more moms are breastfeeding and I do my best to be an advocate for that. I nursed my daughter until she was 4 and my son weaned himself at 17 months and I even tandem nursed the two for one year. The best years of my life! There is no substitute for mama's milk - the nutrients and the love are irreplaceable. Making something as natural and healthy as breastfeeding sexual is so narrow-minded and stupid.

Jolea

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I can't even believe that breastfeeding has to be justified! We wouldn't be here if it was wrong because there was no formula back in the day.

We ARE MAMMALS!! the word MAMMAL comes from "mammary glands" That's what is in commom with all mammals.. BREASTFEEDING

SK

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Breastfeeding is more of a "sensual" pleasure, than "sexual". Like a backrub.

I think one of the unrecognized benefits of breastfeeding a baby is that the frequent skin contact fulfills a need for touch and cuddling that women crave. Women often complain that husbands want to have sex when the woman "only wanted to cuddle." Husbands are frustrated the woman turns down sex, and wives are frustrated by lack of cuddling. Babies never tire of being held and cuddled, and both mom and baby thrive on it!

stubber

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Thank you for the article on "Is breastfeeding a sexual act?" A question that has been in my mind most of my life.

My sister couldn't breastfeed because it felt good. She thought, if it felt good with her baby it must be a sin ....

I think breastfeeding is as beautiful as a child's laughter...
Oh! I better watch it, somebody in Texas will think I am a pervert for thinking a child's laughter is beautiful..

I do have three grown children and five grandkids.
Their naked skin against mine, as I tried to be a help, was a "Warm Fuzzy".... nothing sexual there.

I watched in amazement as my two daughters, one stepdaugher, and many friends breastfeed their children... nothing sexual there... just the peace in my heart... bringing a smile to my face... Breastfeeding is about the child, not the mother...
Love Ya!
Norman P

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Breasts are God's way of feeding a new born~!

Sean

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I read your page on the false view of breastfeeding being a sexual act, and I remembered something from when I was but a very young child, not long after my mother stopped lactating.

My parents were in bed watching TV, and my mother had her shirt off. I was still quite young (only a few years old), but I remember her letting me suckle on her nipple at my request, as it did help calm me down and brought back memories. I sucked on it for a bit, and then was a little disappointed at the lack of milk. I walked off. But looking back now, I know that never once did any sexual thought come across my mind, and I doubt one came across hers.

Also, in regards to your pages on why breasts are seen as sexual objects or objects of obsession, something that was mentioned on a nudist website (Pure Nudism was the place) is very similar to some of your explanations. One example given there was a child of nudist parents and his eight year old friend finding a Playboy magazine. The one without nudist parents giggles and enjoys the pictures, while the one with nudist parents looks at them and says that that's what people look like without clothes, and there's nothing really big about them. Frankly enough, being exposed to breasts enough from my studies in the arts and having a little sister that I've helped my mother raise, I find little attraction to breasts nowadays.

Thank you for taking the time to make 007b.com =). It's been quite educational, and several female friends of mine absolutely love the place. It's also increased my respect for women and those who breastfeed. I was breastfed exclusively, as were my five siblings, and I thank my mother for it, as nothing is better for the developing child than a breast full of milk.

-Sam Tootell

PS Good luck with educating more people on the true purpose of breasts =). Being able to draw nude figures without being viewed as a pervert truly helps out my reputation as an artist.

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It is a scientific fact that women with rounded hips and large breasts are typically more fertile than extremely thin women with small or no breasts. For thousands of years, in every culture, men have sought out women with round hips and large breasts because they are viewed as being better able to bear and nurse their children. In some cultures, these desires are simply not as blatant as they are here. In fact, in some cultures the impulse for this is quite subconscious and the men are not aware of it really. The fact also remains that round hips and large breasts are present in women with elevated levels of estrogen during and after puberty. The presence of this hormone and the amount present in each woman determines how fertile she is, and the ease with which she can not only conceive a child, but also bear and nurse that child. The higher the amount of estrogen, the easier this process will be, the lower the amount, the more difficulty she will likely have in one or all of these tasks.

Steve

There is a speck of truth here. However, in today's society, the attraction males have to breasts is WAY beyond the simple idea that large breasts would signal a woman is more fertile. Today, many men are conditioned (as in Pavlov's experiment) to be sexually aroused at the sight of breast anytime, anywhere, and to consider breasts something *specifically* arousing and sexual. Besides, in today's world, this issue is confused by xenoestrogens, obesity, and chemicals that lessen one's fertility.

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I would have to agree with this site, no matter how "sexual" use men may find the breasts, they still have a particular function like all our other organs in our body. We should get it out of our heads that breasts are the main thing in terms of what makes a woman. This may seem like a daft solution, but maybe women should just not wear anything on the top half of the body. Then we may get bored of the breasts, and move onto something else, like the mind.

Andrew

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Thank you, thank you,
your site was such a source of peace to me....
I have spent much time on it and am finally feeling much more comfortable with myself for the first time ever!!

joanne

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I'm glad the family is reunited and saddened by the fact that this still happens.

I have 2 daughters, one 16 which I breastfed for 4 weeks, and a 10-year old which I breastfed for 6 weeks. For the first one I never nursed in public, and the 2nd one I was told not to nurse in public, but use the public restroom from my husband because he didn't understand and we weren't taught that breastfeeding is a good thing AND nothing to be ashamed of. I wish I would have done it longer and in the open, but I stopped go to back to work full time and not to embarrass anyone. I shortchanged myself and my girls of this wonderful blessing and of teaching others. If I could do it over again, I would for as long as they needed to nurse. I am 35 and we are not planning on having any more children.
Regretful

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I agree that the most sexual organ in our bodies is the brain. And we need to change our brain towards the women's breast and think of it as a grace from our GOD to them to feed their babies and take out the tradition ideas about that issue...

JOHN

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I find it outrageous and silly that anyone would find breastfeeding sexual. Breastfeeding is a natural part of life and should be respected as one. As for breasts being sexual objects, the media and the porn industry made them sexual and people seem to forget that breasts are really milk organs.

Brandon

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Thank you for your sincere objective views in your article.
I think that it is just SICK how our society has evolved with regards to women and breastfeeding. I am appalled at the store clerks obvious naivete and perverted mind and the minds of the people who sought to prosecute an innocent couple.
America needs to get back to the basics and recognise that God intended the breast of a woman to be used as how this family did.... to ensure that their child received the nutrition and nutrients that only breast-feeding could give. Procecutors need to stop majoring in minor issues and do the job that they were called to do.... to procecute the guilty, not the innocent.

Sharon

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I think that is so sad. When I BF my first child my husbands family would disappear in a heartbeat when I started to feed her.

Gail

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I may be male... but I mean come on. Breastfeeding a baby and they are charged with sex abuse? x.x so much for "Freedom" in our state. For the male side, breastfeeding is something that is done with babies which will make them healthier. Not something for the men to watch and drool on.

Sandrock

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I think this is absolutely ridiculous. That poor child and those poor parents!! I think breastfeeding is a natural part of life and if people don't like it they can look the other way.

KellyF-BFing supporter

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I am very impressed by your article. With all the obvious, proven, benefits of breatsfeeding (it's the way God intended!), it was a shock to me how many people (men and women) were uncomfortable around me while I breastfed. They were worried that my nipple might show. I was as discreet as possible, but I thought how sad it is that some in our society feel shame about nourishment of a baby. Bravo on your article!

Mary

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It is really amazing and tragic that we associate the pleasure of cuddling and touch with sexual stimulation. Any fool should be able to tell the difference, but our culture (prudes and libertines both) has been so obsessed with sex for such a long time now that even intelligent, sensitive, good-hearted people get confused. Thanks for telling the truth!

Jochanaan

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